Expectations, Disappointments, and Such

I played it all out in my head (my imagination), hoping that it will all work out they way I anticipated. Thinking about it and basking in the notion of how things could possibly progress gave me the giggles, a smile that stretched longer than a mile, shear pleasure, and a bout of nervousness all at once. But of course, reality set in and I had to readdress my expectations. Disappoinment set in as I began to see things for what they are...listening and then observing behavior. Actions speak louder than words, right? Yet a part of me is doing a little compromising. It is possible that I am being stubborn. It is possible that I just want what I want on my terms. Fear...I fear slipping back into old habits and accepting mediocrity. I'm left staring at the situation, not sure of what to do. My own emotions hurt me sometimes and when it comes to certain matters, reason is not anyone's best friend. My best recourse???? Take a step back...don't move...don't speak. Just stand still.

Was Feeling Chaka Khan's "Angel" today

Troubled little angel
Inconsistent flying blind most of the time
Drama queen

Preening and untangling
The feathers in her wings
Captured by her dreams
Desperatly she sings

Needy little baby
Open up you heart
Don't you think it's bad to feel
Needy little baby
Hiding deep inside
Don't you know your love can heal

Troubled little angel
Inconsistent flying blind most of the time
Don't know who to be

Always rearranging the wreckage of her life
Ever holding tight
To the hope that she'll be free

Needy little baby
Open up you're eyes
Don't you be afraid to feel
Needy little Baby
Hiding deep inside
Don't you know that love can heal

Talking to you Angel.. Angel
Deep inside of me
Talking to you Angel... Angel
One day you'll be free

Angel... Angel
Deep inside of me

Angel... Angel
One day you'll be free

One day you'll open your wings
One day you'll fly...

"So tell me Slim what you wanna do
When you know I’m in love wit you
Every time that i turn around
look for you but you cant be found
Fly free baby fine wit me
I’m in love wit a bumble bee
ooh Slim , boy you killing me
but you so sweet ta me"

That says it all...